So you want to be a drag queen

So you want to be a drag queen.
Sure its fun but first determine what you think you are going to get out of the experience.

Step 1
Stand in your underwear in front of a full length mirror.
The is the canvas you have to work with...and no amount of I'll go to Jenny Craig next week is going to: A. Aid the process.

Step Two
Buy your self Underwear
and decent pair of shoes.
Comfort over fashion can be an advantage.

Step Three.
Decide on how you see yourself.

Step Four
Find a friendly drag queen to assist you

Step Five
Just do it.

coming your way

Perfection.....

Now we had to get that one right.....

Now the picture......

Now is that marketing....or What.

Cheeky eh.But it's about the dollars.

AND you have to think clever to be clever.

Damned Diva Rule One.

The proudest achievement

The Facts of Life......

I have always wondered at times and yet have retained,a lot of good advice shared in humour.Now much of that humour has many slants.But the humour that has stayed with me,is the honesty from which it is told and evolved.
A for instance. My sexual education was sparse.But my mother's advice was not.
If the bedroom isn't working then you shouldn't be there in the first place.
Bedrooms are for relationships.The living room is not.
In fact in the generation of our mothers life was so much simpler.
She didn't have to get the barage of magazines with young slim and vulnerable, expounding on the Orgasm.If history and the legends serve us right our mother's genration were lucky if sex didn't culminate without the benefit of foreplay.Unless you were in a parked car
after a saturday dance.
Now you go to town.Stand about consuming as much alcohol, it takes to disguise the fact,
that you really are there with your fanny hanging out.Orgasm.Pah.
I invented it.
So taking one's mothers advice.It stands to reason.If the head board isn't banging.
Then there isn't a relationship going on.
My mother's other bouquet,was
Your father was always so accomodating.
Imagine Saturday night.
It's the art of finding someone.Accomodating.
In my mother's generation it was harder to get into her knickers,when currently
underwear is optional. The Accomodation might not have long,dusted the cobwebs off.
And in farewelling, the wry humour of my mother's teaching.
Such is the pomposity of the human pattern,that when finding out you are
about to attend the funeral of her lover in senior years.While few are are aware of the sexual /emotional nature of the relationship.
I was glad of the almost greek proportions of my mother in mourning.
Quite the spectacle.
It seems. After burying two husbands .
That to find an accomodating man.
Humour.True to tell.

Stretching the Canvas

So you think you can lip sync....Try performing to a deaf audience.
Well,you cant help but thinking that that might be brave,but rest assured
it was a reassurance that the art of performance could be brought to everyone.
You'd think.
Tough crowd.
I've seen rougher.
But tougher no.
But had I not had the friendship and companionship of my friend,
and constant muse. A confounding woman who ownership on God,
does warrant thinking about
Joanne Klaver.Deaf.Maori.Lesbian.Solo Mother.Activist for Deaf.
Truly with a wheel chair.She's got the job.
But..as friends do. When others may have dimissed the fact
that at one period of my life,the arse was hanging out of my trousers.
She was there is all ways for me.
Kia Kaha.....but she's so stubborn,cheeky,staunch...the list goes on...
For you......It was reward itself to be there for you