Dusting off the Gloves....or How to give up smoking and not lose your temper

Well....it's really hard to get a real grip on things until you have to throw away,what you used to call one of life's little pleasures.I ask you all to carry on smoking.Ash Trays are provided. Thank you. and the sandtraps in the Vintage World War One Helmuts are not your grandfather's ashes.You may extinguish at any time in them.Thank you...the excess smoke means I don't have to use vaseline over the lens.It seems so Twentieth Century to light the scene a la Casablanca...when now the icy lines of reflective glass and Imax buildings dot the skyline.
Standing on the sidewalk indirect competition with the automobile,the smoker has been austracised.
In times past there was ladies smoking room at department stores.
Gentlemen retired for a cigar. The image of John Wayne's Lung, if it had been available might have set the tide of political correctness.Now after some twenty five years of following Sir Walter Raleighs gift from the indians at the end of a filter...
Time to...cut the anchors and set the unstable ship of rationality to venture.
Ok.
I use a cigarette in the average conversation as a matter of course. Realise that most people don't. Strike One.
It give's me something to do with my hands.Take up juggling.It's annoying but it keeps your hands busy.Strike Two.
It fills gaps in conversation.Well if you had anything to say it might be considered a conversation.Move on You're bored. Strike Three....and who said that's when they call you out.The list goes on.
It's a weight thing. Well.If it's a weight thing start the exercise.Lighting a cigarette is barely exercising an idea.
I use it to relax. Most people find some extra time to masturbate.Utilise time smoking in pursuit of other activity..mental and well as...yada yada yada...
and before you know it ,you have filled out a months subscription to Jenny Craig
and you are contemplating a self help book...when the very idea of Self Help is wearying....
OP'S ...or as they say Other peoples.Considering the recession .It wouldn't take long before you'd be given the exit card in any conversation.
Ok.As long as they stop the sophorific advertising for a smoke free generation.
I used to think every time that one delivered it's message, amidst the male deodourant,easy cook,and whiteware commercialism of Television.
Yeh don't be a cheap skate.Get digital. End of Strike.
Take it out on your friends.At the end of any day any emotion expressed in the drying out process....may be reviewed ,but unlikely to miss it's intent.
You're Out.
Progress report.....I am contemplating three small coloured balls.